Athletics Day. By Oscar
I am learning to:
- use punctuation in my writing
- use different types of sentences
- write for an audience
Success Criteria: I can:
- use a capital letter to start each sentence
- use a full stop at the end of each sentence
- use conjunctions
- use simple and compound sentences
- use exciting words
- make my writing interesting
Athleticts day.
On Athleticts day lots of amazing events and we did shot put and discus and 06 meter sprint and 100 meter sprint and I wan all the events esept one. And it was long jamp decayse it was verw windy and I onle one loning ginp Wen it is hot wndy and the trees are bloing dane and it was had to ran So I lost.
On Athletics Day there were lots of amazing events and we did shot put and discus and 60 metre sprints and I won all the events except one.It was long jump because it was very windy and I only had one jump. When it is hot, windy and the trees are blowing down, it is hard to run, so I lost.
Oscar, you are beginning to use capital letters to start a sentence and a full stop to end each one. Don't forget to do this all the time. You are beginning to use compound sentences. You have explained why it is hard to make a good long jump. It was good to see that you have thought about what made it hard for you to do a good long jump.
ReplyDelete" Well done, you have good things in your writing like punctuation," said Jade.
ReplyDelete""It was good how you told us what the weather was doing and how it made it hard for you to jump," said Jackson.
"You did good thinking and wrote everything you did on Wednesday," said Emma.
" He has put some capital letters and full stops in the right place," said Austen.
"You have used because, and, except and the way you used them. I like the way you talked about the places you came and I can picture it in my head," said Ben.
"well done Oscar, you have used some compound sentences," said Ava.
"Next time I will reread it to check it makes sense," said Oscar. " I had some good ideas. I am pleased with my writing because it was long and cool and explained things well."